Another Zero Digit Birthday

My father was born in 1924; I was born in 1954, so we always celebrated "zero-digit" birthdays in the same year.  The year Dad pointed this out to me, I was turning 30, he was turning 60.  Now that I am 60, or close-to-it, I have to wonder if I will ever be as snazzy as my dad was.  Will I ever be respected like he was?  Will I live to see 75, as he did not? 

I hope I live at least that long.  I want to live long enough to look gorgeous and piss all the jealous people off even more than they already are.  I want to tell the people who have been so awful to me that they are truly grotesque, and I gave them chance after chance to redeem themselves over the years, but they never cared to do it.  For example, my daughter-in-law, Kasey.  She, for some reason, has chosen to NOT let me see my grandchildren. Granted, her mother flipped a truck with her baby brother in it once while she was doing crack, but I've never even had a fender bender, let alone a DUI or flipped a vehicle.  The first few years of my son's marriage, Kasey was so nice, always visiting, bringing Tiramisu, smiling, hugging, staying in touch.  Then my father died, I inherited some money ( GAVE HER AND MY SON A DOWN PAYMENT FOR THEIR HOUSE) and opened a restaurant that destroyed my marriage, and when I left my last husband, Kasey stopped visiting, stopped smiling, stopped talking to me.  Why?  I don't know. All I can do is forgive her for the years of awfulness and go on, right?

Wrong.  I can forgive Kasey and move on with my life. If I do not, I will constantly think of the holidays when I have not received one phone call from my son or grandkids to wish me well.  If I do not forgive her, my resentment will eat me up and destroy me. 

I am better than that. I may remember all those lonely holidays, but I also know that I am a good woman.  I always TRY do the right thing when it comes to my child and grandchildren.  I think a Mother who keeps her children from seeing their grandmother is selfish, she is not doing the right thing. I think selfish people get what they deserve, in the end.  They end up bitter and alone, in a prison of their own making. Surely if she is that inconsiderate to me, she is inconsiderate to others.

Another person in that same category is my sister, Karen.  She has recently accused me of contacting all of her old high school friends and saying "terrible" things about her to them. Like what, Karen?  I didn't tell them you have an opioid dependency.  I didn't tell them you told me the bus was leaving from Camp Ernst WHEN I WAS SIX YEARS OLD and caused me to run out naked in front of everyone.  I did not tell anyone you let your house get so dirty that you have to use the bathtub for a toilet.  No, I didn't say any of that to anyone, until now.  Also, I did not press charges when you stole the money from my father's estate...you cashed his last IRS refund check and went to Miami with the money.  Shame on you.

So, you see, there are ways to forgive, but first you must confront. 

This is my confrontation. Both Karen and Kasey get to read this and hope that readers will forgive and forget their bitchiness as well.

That, my dear lambsies, is not gonna happen any time soon.

Happy Birthday to me.


the last time I saw all my grandkids was 4 years ago :(