is the grass any bluer...

is the grass any bluer...
on the other side?

Wednesday, September 8, 2010

The times, they are a-changin.

As I get older and the days go by, I sometimes have mini-epiphanies. They're a lot like mini-strokes, actually, except I come away healthier, with a little more spring to my step and am kinda proud of my progress as a human being.  No, it's not being smug, it's just a happy "aha" moment that helps me deal with, well, being me.

For example, growing up in an opinionated family, I always thought everyone was opinionated.  I later learned that 'opinionated' is sometimes spelled 'obnoxious.' Don't get me wrong - it's not soup yet, I am still a work in progress; I'm constantly re-learning that lesson, actually, but the more I remember to hold my tongue, the better off I am in the long run.  

Secondly, it's much easier to break someone else's heart than to have your heart broken.  Believe it or not, I've broken a few hearts in my day...and wow, I never knew how much it stung until I was knocked down had to scrounge around on the ground and find the fragments of my own soul in a desperate attempt to put it back together.  All the king's horses, and all that, y'know -- yeah, having your heart broken sucks. Plain and just does. Was it easy for me to leave those who loved me and adored my every move? Nope. It wasn't easy at all, but I did it, for whatever reason I thought I had. Yes, I had some measure of guilt about it, but until I was the victim of a callous companion, the fact that I hurt them so deeply didn't really occur to me.  Silly me.  

Thirdly, sharing music with someone is probably the best gift you can ever give them.  Today I visited a friend with whom I've prayed and certainly done the best I could to help during a fairly traumatic time of transition -- but I picked up my ukulele and took it along today and we sang all my lil songs in my songbook, sang until it was time for me to go home.  One extra little nugget in that goldmine is that my friend has a gorgeous voice - something I would've never discovered had I not taken the time to sit down and sing with her. The crux of that lesson is that yes, I enjoy singing for myself, but I really, really enjoy it more when I can harmonize and/or my focus is in joining with someone else's voice or voices of others.
There are plenty more moments of clarity I could bore you with here, but it's easy to see the common thread that runs throughout this whole train of thought.  It is that when I am selfish, I am not the best person I can be to my fellow man and woman.  When I get bogged down in my own opinions, when I only think of the repercussions other people's actions have on me, when I keep my blessings and gifts all to myself and don't share them, I am the one who loses.  I have to remember to shine the Light all around the neighborhood, and not hide it under a!  

I'm gonna let it shine.

peace, y'all,

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